Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Ship Of Broken Dreamsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Algol46
    ASL Info:    200/m/East of Eden
    Elite Ratio:    2.72 - 1111/1235/613
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 666
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 522



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots Ship Of Broken Dreamsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I watched the ghost wind sway the grass,
    And rake the waves with unseen tines,
    Blow spoors from nodding dandelions,
    Across a rippled lake of glass.

    That lake is like a mirror set
    Within some Sirenís castle keep
    And all who gaze therein must sleep
    The awful sleep of sad regret.

    And now that ghost wind fills the sail
    Of my poor ship of broken dreams
    Till all this world to my heart seems
    So like the coldest Winter gale.




    Submitted on 2007-08-06 15:36:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i particularly liked the last verse. Though, i got a little confused about the soul of the poem..but after reading the last verse, everything just made sense.

    keep writing

    - v
    | Posted on 2007-08-07 00:00:00 | by vedanta19 | [ Reply to This ]
      ~*~

    Poured with mystique and silk. I always admired your grasp of the English language, you seem to combine the most alluring words into a spectacular puzzle image. Intriguing, no doubt. Once again you show how much you like to use the motif of the sea and how your rhyming formation works like a charm.

    ~*~

    P
    | Posted on 2007-08-07 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      I have to agree with Ron. This is one of the best poems I've read. You'll be finding this on my favorites list.
    | Posted on 2007-08-06 00:00:00 | by Megsrus aka Meg | [ Reply to This ]
      Golly, for such a short poem, this bit of verse tells a mighty tale! Aaaah, that "Ship of Broken Dreams", the tattered vessel that I often sail, and on a voyage that leads to nowhere! Penned with the eloquence and vision of the master himself! To use your most apt phrase "Bravo, Bravo, Bravo"!!!!!!
    | Posted on 2007-08-06 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    147722

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    no words for how graceful you are in this moment written by Daniel Barlow
    Cover written by saartha
    Every..... written by jackz
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Carry written by saartha
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    Etiquette written by saartha
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry