Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Today Societydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 117
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 769
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 767



    Description:
       Just annoyed at the sterotypes ppl have


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsToday Societydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Today society
    Crying is something left up to the females
    I disagree
    Crying is for all kinds
    Males, females, whites, blacks, short, tall, skinny, and fat

    Tears are the most powerful emotion,
    It only shows that youre human.
    Tears are like crystals, so beautiful,
    As a warm spring day watching the sunset
    With champagne, rose pedals, chocolate covered strawberry, candle light, and an Engadgement ring to purpose to the angel that lay next to you, on the outskirts of the cities

    Let it rain
    Tears sending shivers down a spine
    Knowing these tears are mine and only mine
    Somthing that can't be taken away and will never go get up and leave you behind.




    Submitted on 2007-08-12 12:53:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hey, i like this one!!! i agree with you tears are the most power-ful-est...especually think of all the emotion behind them.
    i also how you discibe tars in your poem:

    "Tears are like crystals, so beautiful,
    As a warm spring day watching the sunset
    With champagne, rose pedals, chocolate covered strawberry, candle light, and an Engadgement ring to purpose to the angel that lay next to you, on the outskirts of the cities"

    i thought it was a very good write!!! keep it up!!
    ;P
    xxkatexx
    | Posted on 2007-09-05 00:00:00 | by koolness | [ Reply to This ]
      Heh, I like this one. Though I thought you were going to write about people without manners or something along those lines. You didn't and it still sounded good. Usually when I think of tears I think of sorrow or something bad. But you wrote about tears of happiness, maybe sad tears too but it still sounded beautiful. I forgot about tears of happiness.
    Maybe on stanza 2 near the end you're stretching it a little bit(Just my opinion). But it still is good.
    And I guess when you do cry, you realize that you are human and have feelings too. Heh, I don't know where that came from. Good work. Thanks for sharing.
    | Posted on 2007-08-13 00:00:00 | by emoxday | [ Reply to This ]
      There's certainly plenty of reasons to cry in today's society. I find crying a relief at times but realize it seems too much reserved for the females. I'm not certain if that fault can be placed on parenting or on other men's expectation that toughness excludes tears. In either event, your poem got me thinking. There are a couple misspelling that can be easily fixed (propose, line 11, and something, next to last line). Sharon
    | Posted on 2007-08-12 00:00:00 | by Peggy Paris | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    147967

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    untitled written by Outlaw
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry