Description: My December is a song by Linkin Park, about having everything but giving it away in a second for the one you love. Its a sad song, brings tears to my eyes, just like he did.
My December -------------------------------------------
I walked on clouds spelling your name
Hidden behind eyelids and hair
As flowers began to blossom an ivy bridge between us.
The sweet perfume mingled with the clouds created illusions
Behind which you hid with arrows,
And pierced the bridge
Along with my clouds
And caused my heart to bleed
So that it stood shriveled and weak; not able to mend the hole
Time passed and the heart became over-exhausted
The body slowly broke into pieces, caging the heart
Untill it developed into the lava rock it is today; with a weak shriveled heart inside of it, unable still to mend your puncture.
My December is still one of my all-time favorite songs so the title immediately caught my attention.
As for your piece, I enjoyed it very much. Unclosed wounds are something I'm very familiar with so I was able to relate to it in a very emotional way.
The structure flowed nicely and your words painted the picture well. There are a few spelling errors, but you know, that can easily be fixed. I enjoyed in particular, the very last line.
"unable still to mend your puncture."
It brings this piece to life, in my opinion, and opens the door for the true meaning behind the imagery and metaphors.