Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: My recorddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: every48seconds
    ASL Info:    25/M/toronto
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 123/163/129
    Words: 86
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 618
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 574



    Description:
       Umm well i wrote this cause like , felt like this , i could explain better but like you'll probably get it , and thanks to everyone who ever commented on anything i ever wrote , i really accreciate it alot , more than anything , thanks again


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMy recorddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Silent record
    Scratching sounds cut through the air
    With every sound a rock falls
    By the hands of strangers at times
    Others by family
    And mostly by friends
    The record slowly begins cracking
    Eventually snaps
    Then just gets put back together somehow
    Silent record is all it's supposed to be
    No sound , simply there
    To occupy the time of those that feel like watching
    And when there done
    It goes silent once more
    Until it crackes once more , without it coming back together




    Submitted on 2007-08-15 10:02:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was pretty Good, I think i t could use more work on the flow and re-wording the piece a lil bit in area's to have the piece go toghther better other then that i like how u use the smybol of a record in your piece that somthing diff and the good..

    Well hope to hear from you and keep up the good work

    Max
    | Posted on 2007-08-15 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    148117

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by Outlaw
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    Dream written by closetpoet
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Live In Between written by teika5
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry