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Who knows


Author: No Talent
ASL Info:    24/m/Ny
Elite Ratio:    4.12 - 263 /178 /31
Words: 219
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 1460
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1366



Description:


In terms of feedback i'm looking for whether or not you like the poem, how it made you feel and what you think its about. because to me it can mean many things on many different levels


Who knows




Who knows...
who knows why were here tonight
driving down the road flashing lights
rumble of traffic and the pound of a silent ruckus
surrounding us and the world around us
those held in that grasp, marbles among the future
sprinkled upon the past
and shattered on the walls
like my hope and Our past
roll thru time and roll as dice do
50/50
determine my fate
if only you knew
It was all true
But..Who really knows
Who truly understands
Why are we here tonight
as the world flashes by
Cascading across my face, in a spin art of iron n brick
Burning ..Burning
On this mid-summers eve
Where the world passes by
where the unexpected is expected
and my whole world collapses around me
slowly ..slowly
Everything changes and you realize the truth we all wished for
but yet..regret
As the world passes me by
I sometimes wish I could fly
fly away from it all
Forget
and lose myself ,upon the night
and that silent fight ,deep within me
although no one knows, why where here tonight
I’m glad
tho in pain
I’m glad
the worst is over
and I know where I’m going..
Tonight




Submitted on 2004-06-20 18:26:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Hey the piece has depth and its completely hopeless. the feeling of it atleast and a person is at one time or another hopeless. The hopeless thing is that this is a great piece by some one who has declared themselves No Talent and that is untrue. Have a nice day. Just fix the grammar a bit. Great write. Ash
| Posted on 2005-07-20 00:00:00 | by SincerWritinAsh | [ Reply to This ]
  and the pound of a silent ruckus
I really like that

where the unexpected is expected
and my whole world collapses around me
slowly ..slowly
Everything changes and you realize the truth we all wished for

and that...


I sometimes wish I could fly
fly away from it all
Forget
and lose myself ,upon the night
and that silent fight ,deep within me
although no one knows, why where here tonight

and especially that...


this is one of your best writes I think... it has a wringing heart that isn't... to overwrung, like some bleeding heart, it's a very good piece...

and it's really deep, it must be read a few times to get all of the little subtle things,but it is an amazing piece, I will be reading it again..

good work
Ora
| Posted on 2004-06-27 00:00:00 | by Oracle | [ Reply to This ]


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