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I closed my eyes You were here I opened them You'd dissappeared You left me a long time before i'd even realised you'd gone And you promised me You wouldn't let go but take a good look around You're nowhere to be found Was it that you hurt me intentionally? or did you just forget about me Cause my heart shattered the moment u left me But here i am I'm blindfolded now tracing memories as i run around this empty room chasing shadows of where you used to be I'd stop this nonsense if you'd come back again but right now it's the only thing that keeps me sane the only thing that stops the pain |
Your spelling has a few errors, and the structuring feels off. For example: "I closed my eyes, you were here" I feel like it isn't necessary for those two lines to be separate, they would look better as one line. But that's entirely up to you. Such a tragic poem, but well-written and not forced and re-hashed. Well done. Keep Writing, Elle | Posted on 2007-08-26 00:00:00 | by GetFighted | [ Reply to This ] | |