Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: My own witnessdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: every48seconds
    ASL Info:    25/M/toronto
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 123/163/129
    Words: 146
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 675
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 803



    Description:
       Don't know really , but this just popped up


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMy own witnessdots
    -------------------------------------------


    A dream
    That began as any other dream would , for me
    A white clearing , empty and blank
    Normally I'd fill it in by now
    But I didn't
    Instead I started walking straight
    In the distance I saw a tree
    I walked up to it , stared at the body suspended by a wire
    And it was me
    My mutilated corpse , arms chopped up , legs pierced by iron shells , but head perfectly intact
    And I sat down to think , pull out a book and started drawing it
    Every hole , every cut , everything
    And I smiled during it
    Then I got up , cried , alot until the world flooded
    And after that , I look at this scene
    I seen two of me die , And I stared down at my bare feet
    And realized
    I'm finally insane




    Submitted on 2007-08-30 11:22:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      yes, yes, yes I at least think I get the hidden meaning here (That would be due to the excellent title) This misk writing tells a great story and I like the way you capped it off in a lighter note, again at least it felt that way to me, Nice work dude,

    ~Matt.
    | Posted on 2007-08-30 00:00:00 | by forfila | [ Reply to This ]
      hmm...i love it. i could totally see your mangled corpse. it was deliciously repulsive. you made my blood run cold. and for the record, i dont think you're mad...i think you're brilliant...keep it up.

    cheers.
    | Posted on 2007-08-30 00:00:00 | by Alyra | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    148760

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by ShyOne
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Love written by saartha
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    prison written by ShyOne
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry