[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: A child minddots

    Author: taintedsmiles
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 64/90/75
    Words: 355
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1063
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2265

       When you are a child life is filled with hope and wonder and sparkly stars and nothing matters, until you get older the world changes you...into what you are today...but what do you become and why is the question isn't it?

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA child minddots

    glimmer twinkle sparkle
    a child full of hunger
    "she's beautiful,
    so cute,how old is she?"

    love me love me
    hug me hold me
    grasp my hand
    go outside and twirl me

    don't blink sweet baby
    don't close those precious eyes
    for everything thing you see today
    is just tomorrow's ugly demise

    bashing plastic and a watch
    slithers away
    and time is broken
    in her precious mind

    "I'm going to steal you,
    my beautiful baby, you'll be mine forever..."
    tick tock tick tock
    don't look in the mirror
    never see what time
    has stopped

    runnning screaming
    tears of joy
    2....laugh and giggle
    ...7.....make friends forever
    don't look in the mirror

    "Oh dear, what happened...
    Is that you baby girl?
    Where did those pretty eyes and curls go?
    Oh no...."
    screetching far leaving
    a cloud of dust
    What's wrong with me
    What did i do wrong
    Was is all those words i let fall
    from my mouth
    or the food i let in

    2....laugh and giggle
    ....7...make new friends...
    14...losing buddies
    depression sets in
    roll up
    lick it
    seal it
    now toke it
    forget that you had problems

    "How's that sweet baby girl doing?"
    "What a shame....
    she could have been so much better"

    I only wanted:
    love me love me
    hug me hold me
    it only lasts so long until we all
    get older
    grow quiter
    until we laugh
    now cry....
    we find this sixteen year old girl
    now cutting...popping pills
    wishing to die

    if only they loved her...held her...
    because deep down she'll always be that
    cute baby girl
    she hasn't changed
    only the world...

    Submitted on 2007-09-07 23:23:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]