[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Happy Birthday momdots

    Author: Katlord
    ASL Info:    24/no thanks/my room
    Elite Ratio:    2.17 - 375/199/101
    Words: 55
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1014
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 387

       I'm trying to think up something to put on a birthday card for my mom. I haven't been able to come up with anything better. Anyone have any ideas.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHappy Birthday momdots

    You've always been there,
    to show me the light.
    You've saved me from,
    the childish frights.

    You showed me the sun,
    in the darkest of times.
    I love you so much,
    so I made you this rhyme.

    I know that it's tachy,
    I just wanted to say,
    You're my favorite mother,
    Happy Birthday.

    Submitted on 2007-09-09 06:29:00     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      whoever your mum is, she is exetremely lucky
    | Posted on 2007-12-06 00:00:00 | by Tabris | [ Reply to This ]
      This surely was a very cute and heartfelt piece of poetry for your mother
    ....I am sure she loved this, her 'birthday present' .....

    It is quite short...and sweet and the meter is good too, all these are good points in writing poetry. Nice that you thought of writing this for your mother's birthday.

    The line I like the most is -

    "You're my favorite mother"

    ....thats quite typical of a child while complimenting his or her mother. This made the poem all the better.

    Keep writing. : )
    | Posted on 2007-12-05 00:00:00 | by mdsouza | [ Reply to This ]
      I thinkthis is a really Sweet poem where you show your Momn just how much Her Love truly means to you
    My Mother is and always will be my Best Friend in the World
    I can tell you and your Mom have almost that sale relationship
    I also Hope she has the Best Birthday Ever
    I will be Praying for you both
    God Bless
    Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    | Posted on 2007-11-05 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      "I know that it's tacky"

    Aren't special occasion poems usually tacky anyways? Don't sweat it.

    Mothers, what would we do without them? There is no way that we can ever pay them back for the great things they do for us. And yet we always think we've payed it off with rhymes...how foolish are the children of the world...only when a girl herself becomes a mother will she realize that she can never receive as much in return.

    It's nice to see that you are thinking of your Mom. Lovely to see that.
    | Posted on 2007-10-25 00:00:00 | by AsiaticFox | [ Reply to This ]

    I think it's a really sweet poem Any mother would love a rhyme like that on her birthday card

    | Posted on 2007-09-24 00:00:00 | by Lil Sere | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh, I think it is just fine...any Mom worth her salt will love it and love you.... bravo... bravo... bravo...
    | Posted on 2007-09-20 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
      I don't think there is anything tacky about this poem. What a great tribute to your mom. Most people don't take the time. Good to see that you do. Good poem. Sweet : )
    | Posted on 2007-09-18 00:00:00 | by A Silver Key | [ Reply to This ]
      i think its cute, she'll love it (however on cards to my mum i like to add in something about chores.. like.. whyy, exactly, i skirted them..)

    <3 stay well
    | Posted on 2007-09-09 00:00:00 | by uncertainty | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]