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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I'm Fallingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: DiamondTears
    ASL Info:    16/F/Wa
    Elite Ratio:    3.36 - 61/97/48
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 102
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 822



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI'm Fallingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I知 falling.
    My cheeks are hot,
    My stare is glossy.
    I知 sorry.
    Forgive me.
    I didn稚 mean to get so far ahead.
    It was a mistake.
    Honestly, innocent at first.
    I just wanted a look,
    A smile.
    Anything that acknowledged my form.
    I felt my heart give way.
    All for the hatred of myself.
    Was it worth it?

    I知 falling.
    My hair is damp
    My lips a blue hue.
    I知 worthless,
    Please forget me.
    I知 nothing but a ridged frame.
    I got caught up,
    It痴 a loathing of the mirror.
    All I wanted was to be smaller
    To float on air.
    I just wanted to have control.

    I close my eyes.
    And fall backwards.
    Finally noticed, loved.
    Understood.




    Submitted on 2007-09-10 00:51:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is really good. You write well and eloquently...particularly for what is posted as your age...

    My poetry from that time period was utterly ridiculous.

    But anywho...

    "I close my eyes.
    And fall backwards.
    Finally noticed, loved.
    Understood."

    Great ending...very pretty...I can see you falling

    This is a hard subject to make beautiful, I think...one's self-loathing and need fro acceptance...but you definitely pulled it off.
    | Posted on 2007-09-10 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      This write I really like
    I am a huge fan of mirror poetry
    I have written quite a few of them myself
    It wasnt until I realized you cant Love another until You Love yourself that I finally found myself at Peace
    I like the short quick lines to this write as well Nicely Done
    God Bless
    Ron

    Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    Ron
    | Posted on 2007-09-10 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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