Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Our future...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/380
    Words: 135
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 641
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 813



    Description:
       Knowing I've hurt the only person I have truly loved, knowing I would never intentionally do such thing yet I have managed to do just that.

    I know I will make up for such mistakes in the future and the time we spend together. Although I do wish I could simply erase such mistakes.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOur future...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    "Our" past comes back to me...
    These thoughts that cross my mind of us,
    of the time we have shared together, bring a smile to this face of mine.

    And yet I know I have made my share of mistakes.
    I know my intentions were always good, but things never seem to go the way they were planned.

    I know I hurt you...
    I know I have disappointed you...

    I hope that my intentions weren't overlooked throughout the pain I caused.
    I hope you understand I'd never hurt you intentionally.

    Our future, I know, is going to be bright and filled with joy.
    I know I will make up for all those mistakes I've made.

    I love you, and I'm sorry.
    For I never meant to hurt you.




    Submitted on 2007-09-11 15:23:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      when you can pour out your heart for everyone to see that takes real courage. I give you props on writing something of this degree. Although we make mistakes its our nature no one is perfect....

    To put yourself in the sense of showing your emotional scars is something many ppl wish they could do.

    Excellent job and keep it up
    | Posted on 2009-07-29 00:00:00 | by poet09 | [ Reply to This ]
      I applaud you for laying your soul out for all to see. It is a good thing to make yourself vulnerable and transparent as an artist of any kind whether it be a Writer, Painter or Musician. This connects you with the reader in a very important way, but I must say that some of it was too obvious for me. It didn't seem to challenge me. This isn't a cut down, but it is an encouragement to continue to write from your heart. A poem should have elements of the heart and structure to be a great piece of work.
    | Posted on 2007-09-11 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    149352

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    Fasade written by jackz
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Yes written by poetotoe
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    a safe place written by Daniel Barlow
    Shi written by ShyOne
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry