Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Midnight's Ladydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Peggy Paris
    ASL Info:    61/F/USA
    Elite Ratio:    4.11 - 747/570/167
    Words: 248
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 1308
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1836



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMidnight's Ladydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Our lady walked a lonesome path
    Of pensive solitude
    As quickly twilight passed to dark
    With little interlude.

    A bitter wind engulfed the night
    With fingers icy cold
    That penetrated garments worn
    And slipped through ev’ry fold.

    Unwelcome as a lover spurned
    Persisting undeterred,
    Each gust revealed its fierce intent
    As if irately stirred.

    One sliver of the silver moon
    Connived with sullen clouds
    To peek a tentative lone wink,
    Quite perilous yet proud.

    With eerie hoot and daring howl,
    Night’s creatures, unafraid,
    Overtly gathered undisturbed
    To watch midnight parade.

    If stars would fail their sweet debut
    And hide from human eyes,
    A lonely wanderer might meet
    Some unforeseen surprise.

    What desolation can’t erase
    Bleak eeriness has found.
    An unexpected voice relays
    A most unlikely sound.

    He’d not a calming, pleasant tone,
    This stranger yet unseen.
    She heard his piercing, haunting cry
    From ‘neath the meadows green.

    Her trembling panic took control
    As fear ran through her veins.
    She’d left behind the world she knew
    To tread his dark domains.

    “Come, join me,” said the demon voice.
    “I’ve waited long for you.”
    His eyes, in fiery, crimson glow,
    Came quickly into view.

    Twas not the bitter wind that night,
    But fingers icy cold
    That reached out from his hidden grave
    To pull her in his hold.

    Our lady leaves her misery
    To meet forlorn, lost souls
    Who dare to share her solitude
    On lonely midnight strolls.




    Submitted on 2007-09-15 09:29:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      When I first read this I literally had to go and make myself a cup of hot tea to warm myself up!

    Your images came so clearly in my mind and I was completely drawn in.

    A fav for me.

    E.
    | Posted on 2009-03-11 00:00:00 | by EllusiveEmber | [ Reply to This ]
      WOW i can see my own breath,a chill cold and icy creeps in I dont just like it I love it. You have a new fan dare I say Genius! This poem leaves me so fulfilled I have nothing negitive to say thank you for your poem!
    | Posted on 2007-11-20 00:00:00 | by Diablo Tapitio | [ Reply to This ]
      See, I go in search of titles that intrigue me and here I find a more than excellent read.
    I must visit more of your writing, this is the second piece of yours that leaves me respecting your maturity and patience that is clearly seen in your writing. You weave this story so intricately yet understandable and keep the reader wanting to read more.

    There were many lines in here I really liked, but this whole stanza was just superb:
    "Twas not the bitter wind that night,
    But fingers icy cold
    That reached out from his hidden grave
    To pull her in his hold."
    Well written,

    Lisa
    | Posted on 2007-10-30 00:00:00 | by ravenwolf68 | [ Reply to This ]
      Sharon, you truly turned the muse loose on this clever and foreboding tale. I shall choose to echo Ron's comments.
    | Posted on 2007-09-21 00:00:00 | by ErgoIgo | [ Reply to This ]
      this is truly impressive, well thought out and presented very expertly. Love the whole idea and as Ron cole says it had alittle bit of everything in this and trust me if Ron cole likes it its pretty good cuz he is truly an elite writer, in the fourth stanza

    "With eerie hoot and daring howls",
    "Night creatures, unafraid",
    "Overtly gathered, undisturbed",
    "To watch midnight parade"

    My favourite stanza but in the last line " to watch midnight parade, i think u could use a 'this' in between watch and midnight just for the flow. Overall the only thing in there which is not major but i just picked it up anyways.

    P.S.
    Brian
    | Posted on 2007-09-17 00:00:00 | by b_v_grant | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow! This is a classic! It has everything; a lonely lady, a darkened night, intrigue, suspense, apprehension, drama! And, the rhyme scheme, meter, and story scheme is perfect! I'm delighted and amazed at this marvelous, outstanding piece! High marks and a fav for me gal!
    | Posted on 2007-09-15 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    149550

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    prison written by ShyOne
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    untitled written by ShyOne
    The World written by jjd
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Shi written by ShyOne
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Cover written by saartha
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry