Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: two explanationsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 472
    Average Vote:    2.0000
    Bytes: 779



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotstwo explanationsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    two explanations


    pale not the earnest heart,
    which has no way of beating,
    lest is stop.
    nor in viking savagery,
    cut away the parts that gather
    to your touch.

    in honest hands,
    let tender mercy hold thy way.
    which in loves past pursuits
    has lost, & relost
    what took it to this place.

    with all heart lips
    may lovers tongues be solicitous still.
    & yielding to the breath
    that we expel.
    so that in some reverent possibility
    our skin might touch again

    & again

    in endless, subtle futures
    where our faces meet
    as two explanations
    to the same thought.





    Submitted on 2007-09-20 12:35:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I read and re-read to capture more of your intended meaning and appreciate more fully how the stanzas progressed from heart to hands to lips. Your final lines, "where our faces meetas two explanations to the same thought," made me ponder how true it is that men and women do not think alike even when each is searching after the elusive feeling of love.
    I enjoyed your poem and thank you for getting my brain in gear on this late Friday evening! :-) Sharon
    | Posted on 2007-09-21 00:00:00 | by Peggy Paris | [ Reply to This ]
      Beautiful...as it flows!....
    | Posted on 2007-09-20 00:00:00 | by Ani | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    149844

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Love written by saartha
    Shi written by ShyOne
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Cover written by saartha
    Carry written by saartha
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    prison written by ShyOne
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry