Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A love that is notdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Kube
    ASL Info:    24/M/Australia
    Elite Ratio:    1.93 - 64/56/32
    Words: 132
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 667
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 763



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA love that is notdots
    -------------------------------------------


    What is it that is with me
    I feel this thing that makes me something
    It makes me feel good
    Feel good?
    I never thought I would see the day
    Or think that I would say it

    It comes to me like a plague
    Some how I like it
    I like the way I have become
    I can sleep better now
    Anger does not effect me as much
    But it’s still there

    I watched this in a movie once
    They were happy
    I would like to be that too
    Maybe I can?
    Let’s see if I wake up
    It could be real

    I pray I can see you again
    Maybe tomorrow?
    We can talk about things
    Life and stuff
    I wish you were here
    Or better… real.




    Submitted on 2007-09-24 08:51:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      My first impression: I am feeling it! I like the concept. You make it seem like you are talking about an actual person. Only the title of the poem kind of gave it away. I would change the title to something more mysterious. I love the very end it is brilliant!! Good write.
    | Posted on 2007-09-28 00:00:00 | by Miss Understood | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this, but it could use some stronger words, words like "stuff" and "things" make it seem like a child is writing it.

    I do get the meaning, this is a lot how i feel now.
    | Posted on 2007-09-24 00:00:00 | by MindRape | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this poem I can relate to the feeling.
    | Posted on 2007-09-24 00:00:00 | by Lost-Poet | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    150089

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ME written by jjd
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    This written by Chelebel
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    A Drink written by jjd
    To written by SavedDragon
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Giving written by jjd
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry