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Author: BrokenAngel
ASL Info:    21/F/MI
Elite Ratio:    3.93 - 179 /157 /47
Words: 140
Class/Type: Poetry /
Total Views: 1033
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 911


Umm...this is me rambling and attempting to sort myself out.


I live each day inside a lie
Trying hard I still won't cry
I lift my head up to the stars
And try to image a life I haven't lived
Each day I walk this path alone
Makes me feel like I am unknown
But it doesn't matter because no one cares
All that matters is the fact that I'm unstoppable

I'll fight my way through the trials
Through the thorny paths that life's thrown
It doesn't matter who I hurt (lies)
Because I know that at night I'm still alone
Another loss of human souls
Because I can't face facts I'm shown
Painful thoughts and merciful actions
Throw me back into old passions
I refuse to go back to somewhere worse
When I've found something filled with less hurt
For the first time I've found understanding.

Submitted on 2007-09-28 22:11:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  Not bad at all
ButI do have to admit the rhying you used in this write does seem a little forced
I would try rewriting without the rhyme
But again I stress this is totally up to you this is your write
To me you are speaking of all the relationships that have hurt you throughout life
The Good thing is you still remain Positive and have learned from making wrong decisions
That my Friend is all you could ask for
Great Job!!!
God Bless
Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
Thank You
God Bless
| Posted on 2007-09-30 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  So is this kinda like a journal entry? Or just the way you feel today. (the title) BUt umm.. anyways, the first paragraph is good. In touch with your feelings and what not. But the 2nd half, to me, is not to clear as to what exactly those feelings concern.
| Posted on 2007-09-29 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]

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