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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Itdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Specdro
    ASL Info:    28/Of Course/NY
    Elite Ratio:    2.94 - 21/53/38
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1164
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 381



    Description:
       This poem was my very first.

    It was a class assignment when I was a kid and even though I never wrote again until many years later, this was one of the reasons I did. My teacher told me it was great and had it published in a school printing of creative works without my knowledge.

    The fact that she liked it so much is what makes me write today, I enjoy people reading my work so I want to thank you for taking time to read the work of a then 14 year old.

    Thank you,

    Don

    PS... you have no idea how many times I wanted to rewrite this as I was typing it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsItdots
    -------------------------------------------


    It was when I was young and little,
    It made the leaves twirl in merry dance.
    The air was fresh and clean
    and then it began to pitter patter on the ground.

    It had started.
    In raged it screamed and shouted,
    Its light blinding me
    It was coming, coming for me.

    It hit me many times
    and I cursed it in vain.




    Submitted on 2007-09-29 14:34:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Don't exactly know what lies at the bottom of it. At times it sounds as if you were trying to describe when rains falls from the sky and I also got the impression you were trying to describe dawn or daybreak for that matter.


    It's indeed a nice and enjoyably piece. But possibly the unrelenting used of "it" made it unduly personal without giving one the chance to figure what was the real message. I know that you might have done that intentional.... or maybe I'm bieng dim and missed the point of the whole write ... donít know Ö.


    Nicely done,


    Ethan

    | Posted on 2007-09-29 00:00:00 | by Ethan Brody | [ Reply to This ]


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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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