Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Can you stay?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: vedanta19
    Elite Ratio:    3.3 - 492/502/133
    Words: 96
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 130
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 668



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCan you stay?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    A cloud passes through this soul,
    blinding those dreams - briefly,
    warming the tattered heart - almost suddenly;

    Those short prayers turn in pages of sorrow -
    How should she go on - she wonders;
    The road is long,
    lonely are these thoughts,
    Can you stay?

    If, sometimes you remember -
    do drop by - she wrote with tears
    at stone-carved her,
    bring along - she urged
    some sweet-smelling sunflowers,
    it's autumn you see,
    but
    Can you try?

    Can you stay?













    Submitted on 2007-10-02 13:59:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Can you try? Can you stay? The words echo like eternal loneliness! This poem has a compelling mood about it, that reaches into the core of each of us. And there, it repeats the questions "can you try"? "can you stay"???
    | Posted on 2007-10-03 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      This gives me a real... I wanna say trippy, kinda mystical image. I like it alot, its pretty sad and I get the sense of longing expressed more poignantly than most pieces.
    Nice work
    Josh
    | Posted on 2007-10-02 00:00:00 | by MC white | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.