Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Disquiet Knowledgedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: emoxday
    Elite Ratio:    3.15 - 113/123/144
    Words: 553
    Class/Type: Story/Serious
    Total Views: 575
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 3192



    Description:
       Enjoy. A rough draft of a short story I have to do.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDisquiet Knowledgedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Knowledge, doesn't everyone- at some point strive for knowledge? My craving was nothing less than a curse. I thought it would bring me greatness! Everyday I superciliously unearthed information most fools could never process. Cavalier I was, becoming prideful before my juvenile peers.
    I never believed in any religion, but my thoughts now change. There are supreme beings among us. Though I highly doubt you will believe me, I'm in a penitentiary after all. I was once nihilistic, that is now false. You could say I made a covenant with the devil. Bound my soul in blood, I did! Yes, I guess it is true. It was my curse and also my arrogance that brought me to my demise. Knowledge was a great factor, I shall add. So long ago it feels...
    Lost in my studies I was stupefied by careless philosophy, I did not realize a gent casually leaning against my bookcases with a mischievous grin. "Who are you?" I demanded, acknowledging his presence. He was handsome and young though malicious confidence obstructed his angelic beauty. Although young, implicating arrogance his eyes told me otherwise.
    "Mr. Haxing, do you believe in God (or Satan)?" he asked with a taunting smile. Confused with his abrupt question, formalities forgotten, I answered truthfully "Hah, no. Such ignorant beliefs are a waste of time" a smug smile played across my lips. He laughed, a deathly melodious laugh. So beautiful, yet full of scorn and calamity.
    He studied me for quiet awhile, still smiling as if to some forgotten jest. The rest is quite hazy; he asked what my one desire in life was. I simply answered 'knowledge'. He then nonchalantly removed a book from my library; I remember never laying eyes on such a book before. It was hideous yet magnificent. I couldn't pry my eyes off such enigma. He lilted "omniscience can be granted but with a price." I knew he was not joking, yet I still played along. "Hmm, and what shall this price be?" I sarcastically insisted. "Whatever I see fit, Mr. Haxing."
    I was immediately filled with trepidation, was this an omen? It did not matter; I was already playing a game I could not quit. Given circumstances can not let me tell what price I had to pay, though I would never say so anyways. A horrible price it was. I was handed the book, which on contact immediately pricked my finger, staining itself with my blood. The transaction was finished and the gentleman was gone. I testify I could still hear his tainted laughter!
    Well my desire was fulfilled; I knew all the answers before the questions. I was quiet boastful, to boastful I might add. I even knew about everyone and their certain situations.
    Haha, it was marvelous! But as the weeks passed I was suddenly feared. No one could understand why I knew more than them. They were afraid of my knowledge, of me. Why didn't I realize this would happen? My arrogance got me in this predicament, and there was no way of getting out. I myself knew it was inevitable.
    And here I am, waiting for the sun to set. The gent ready to take me to perdition.




    Submitted on 2007-10-04 21:07:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You need punctuation after the word "Cavaleir" in the 1st paragraph. Different punctuation after"The rest is quite hazy" possibly ; or . would be best although maybe a hyphen would work. "such a thing" is a bit old-fashioned. maybe try just "the thing"
    grief to trepidition or even forboding
    How about an "addictive game of chance" it takes care of both thoughts.
    It ends a bit abruptly, but what other way was it going to end.
    | Posted on 2007-10-05 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    150623

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry