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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Pickledots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Thinkingofyou
    ASL Info:    18/f/The sunny state
    Elite Ratio:    2.83 - 283/423/132
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 955
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 616



    Description:
       Having fun.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPickledots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm stuck in a pickle!
    Dot the I and let the exclamation point speed to the finish line.
    What is this used for anyways?
    Cross the T and watch as the question mark jogs by the travelers.
    This shouldn't be this hard.
    Let each S curve while the period marks the statement.
    Maybe I'll start off with,
    Multiply the F by two and while your eyes slide down the comma onto the list.
    I am stuck in a pickle!
    What ever shall I do?
    This must be a trick question.
    Sincerely yours,
    Finally found the meaning of these silly things.




    Submitted on 2007-10-08 20:32:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      You my dear, are extraordinary at word play.

    Though I really liked the idea within this poem, I found the longer lines a bit distracting as it was followed by a shorter line. It almost gave the poem a feeling or abrupt stops, so it seemed choppy. I think by making them shorter within the places you naturally pause within your speech the poem would flow much easier.

    To tell the truth I never really quite understood or caught the reason why you were 'in a pickle.' I found that to be somewhat unclear.

    Maybe I'll start off with,
    Multiply the F by two and

    Within the break between these two, did you mean to say multiplying? Because other wise the 'Maybe I'll start off with,' seems unnecessary and awkward.
    | Posted on 2007-10-09 00:00:00 | by Jakirina | [ Reply to This ]


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    150811

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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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