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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: It's how she grooves. It moves me too.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Cannablisjunkie
    ASL Info:    22/Male/Indianapolis, IN
    Elite Ratio:    2.59 - 77/147/87
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1192
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 926



    Description:
       POEM, feed-back please. and thanks in advance.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIt's how she grooves. It moves me too.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm climbing up your arms as high as I can,
    untill I fall into your heart and, it's okay because, I am love.
    I'll come on slow, then fast. 'Cause that's us.
    Like when I eat too much medication and forget I must

    I must be here in principal,
    play hard to get 'cause it's magically logical
    that they want what they can't have. So typical.

    I don't smile because I mean it,
    or comb my hair 'cause, yeah, I think it needs it.
    I'm not here in reference to giving a fuck,
    about how I've given so much / never got back enough.

    Keep on keeping your natural distance, it's tight
    your total oblivion is rockin' right out of sight.

    Do me a solid moon light,
    shoot me dead between the eyes.
    Sweet dreams, good-night.





    Submitted on 2007-10-18 19:03:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think this is a really interesting piece. I especially liked the first two lines of the third stanza, as well as the fourth stanzas. I wasn't so sure about the last stanza though. I feel like it's a little too obvious, while the rest of the poem is more subtle. Overall, great poem though.
    | Posted on 2007-11-08 00:00:00 | by themoviesong | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like it. It kind of reminds me of someone...

    "I'm climbing up your arms as high as I can,
    untill I fall into your heart and, it's okay because, I am love.
    I'll come on slow, then fast. 'Cause that's us.
    Like when I eat too much medication and forget I must"

    This part was very pretty... and very real.

    Love it...
    | Posted on 2007-10-21 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      "I'm not here in reference to giving a [censored],
    about how I've given so much / never got back enough.".......
    my favorite lines in this write by far.
    good work.
    </3 lisa
    | Posted on 2007-10-19 00:00:00 | by 777sacrites777 | [ Reply to This ]
      i love this... i really do. it is excellently randomly well written and thats the [censored] i love most. something that sounds like something a real person would feel.
    | Posted on 2007-10-18 00:00:00 | by EEKS | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, I liked it, captured typical relationships well.

    Some of the above sounds like Song Titles...

    Hmm.

    ~Karie
    | Posted on 2007-10-18 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
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    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    151356

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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