[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: I've Never Danced Like Thisdots

    Author: Flowerinbloom
    ASL Info:    22/M/Earth (I think)
    Elite Ratio:    3.5 - 700/559/123
    Words: 116
    Class/Type: Poetry/Romance
    Total Views: 1043
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 828

       Just trying to overcome my rustiness. Tell me what you think.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI've Never Danced Like Thisdots

    I've never danced like this,
    with a blindfold over my eyes,
    trusting you to tell me where to step,
    my palms nested in yours.
    I'm so nervous I'm sweating
    but you dont seem to mind.
    Gently we're swaying,
    Tchikovsky's Symphonie Pathique playing,
    my heart pumping
    but slowly now,
    it's arrested with time.
    I rest my head on your shoulders,
    my soul on your cheek.
    Be careful with it,
    it's been torn before
    but you know how fragile it is
    and you wouldn't hurt me.
    You're soft to the touch
    and you handle me with care.
    It's hard to believe
    it all started with a kiss.
    With my hands in yours
    I've never danced like this.

    Submitted on 2007-10-21 12:29:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Sounds like the blossoming of trust following a mere moment of innocent lust. Dance on my friend, let the music sweep you and she where it will.
    | Posted on 2008-01-04 00:00:00 | by ErgoIgo | [ Reply to This ]
      This is so sweet I absolutely love this. Oh this has the same romantic effect on me like a candle lit dinner on the pier. Oh love it. Now you got me all misty eyed.

    | Posted on 2007-12-01 00:00:00 | by AnotherNobody | [ Reply to This ]
    rusty from what? honey, this is beautiful.
    You managed to sweep me off my feet and enjoy every minute of it.

    "I rest my head on your shoulders,
    my soul on your cheek.
    Be careful with it,
    it's been torn before
    but you know how fragile it is
    and you wouldn't hurt me"

    This absolutely sends me over the edge. That is possibly the sweetest thing to be said to someone.
    This is a love poem ~ a love song, sung in the most perfect key.
    Well written and goes in my faves
    | Posted on 2007-11-09 00:00:00 | by ravenwolf68 | [ Reply to This ]
      Aww That's so sweet. I hate love, but I love this. (I don't know... there's something wrong with me).
    Emotion hangs from every well-written line. The descriptions are too perfect. Really made me feel like I was there... holding onto both of you and dancing as a third wheel should... and enjoying every second of it!!
    Haha Sorry if I've slapped the romance right out of this. I just want to dance....

    Very beautifully done, friend. No rust at all.
    I love it.

    | Posted on 2007-10-23 00:00:00 | by Razor2TheRosary | [ Reply to This ]
      I would read this as a metaphor for love. This one goes in my favorites for its sweet romantic nature and for the personal memories it brought back to my mind. Well done! :-) Sharon
    | Posted on 2007-10-22 00:00:00 | by Peggy Paris | [ Reply to This ]
      i like this alot, it's so sweet. the emotion in it was good. the structure could use a little work and i feel like there should be more. but i liked it well done. Joanna
    | Posted on 2007-10-21 00:00:00 | by heartless_ | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Bam (Awash). written by Daniel Barlow
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    "other people don't get that" written by Daniel Barlow
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Instances written by hyproglo
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ... written by Daniel Barlow
    less is more written by Daniel Barlow
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    Legends written by poetotoe
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stance written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]