wasp

Author: freeradical ASL Info:    22/feline/london Elite Ratio:    5.26 - 311 /405 /63 Words: 53

Class/Type: Poetry /Satire Total Views: 1339 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 349

Description:

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wasp

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my mind is screaming fuck you. my body is screaming fuck me. and i'm stuck between the two like a wasp between the window panes. try and grab me and i swear i'll sting. it might kill me but jesus, it would feel good to hurt you.

Submitted on 2007-10-21 13:33:33     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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So glad I looked at some of your other things than just the one I read........ This is great. Short, sweet. Great imagery. ...Not really anything else to say that hasn't been said already. ...The only thing I can think of is that last line. I kind of get stuck on it. Maybe change "It would" to "It'd." It flows a bit better... Or maybe it's just me (likely). Rachel

| Posted on 2007-10-29 00:00:00 | by sadtrapofgravit | [ Reply to This ]

This is the best piece of Satire on belligerency I have ever read. A great exposure of wickedness which entraps the very being of a person. This piece exposes the futility of causing harm to something that can not be harmed ; thus, the endeavor of doing so has no purpose of fruition. The victim is trapped in a nether-nether world where purpose can have no hope of accomplishment. This piece also reminds me of the terrible sense of debillity which comes through addiction to any mind destroying substance.

| Posted on 2007-10-21 00:00:00 | by realpoet | [ Reply to This ]

haha what a random thought indeed. the harsh honesty of the whole idea is brilliant. i dont think ive read anything as blatant as this in the longest time. and yes... this is an interesting place to be. the mind screaming fvck you could be taken a number of ways but im taking it as a its over/[censored] kinda statement and yet it is contrasted with the second fvck me which is one of needing and longing no matter what a fvcker he is to you... hence the wasp stuck between the two panes of glass [which is a brilliant image here] some days it would be nice to hurt people. i know that sounds cruel but its true... some days people deserve to be hurt the way they have hurt us [though hopefully our logic on this issue has been swayed before we actually make any steps in the actioning of the hurt]

| Posted on 2007-10-21 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]

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