Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Promise me dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Autum-Moon
    ASL Info:    15/Female/drowing
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 284/165/29
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 946
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 595



    Description:
       this is something it threw together i know there is spelling mistakes let me know how u feel about it


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPromise me dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Promise me

    her skin is soft
    her hair smells sweet
    she looks at you
    with worried eyes
    her lips begin to quiver
    and her hands begin to shake
    she reaches out
    and takes your hand
    she looks at you
    tears running down her face
    she pulls you in
    her lips touch yours
    her kiss is soft
    deep and passionate
    an then
    she lets you go
    and slowely whispers
    "put your arms around me,
    never let go.
    Promise me
    we wont fall apart"




    Submitted on 2007-10-30 02:44:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is really nice and sweet, I enjoyed it thoroughly, Nice write
    | Posted on 2007-10-30 00:00:00 | by forfila | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked it all tge way to the end. The last line just threw it all out there. I think you should add more or fix the line. Other than that, it was awesome. Keep up the good work, and I'll keep reading

    »MIss MIsery«
    | Posted on 2007-10-30 00:00:00 | by MinervaBlu | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    151872

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    The World written by jjd
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Hyle written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry