Ear Spanking
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Yah...um...don't ask.
Ear Spanking
Fancy knowing That he thinks you’re cruel. What perversion of the truth! When all you’ve been is Sweet And all you’ve said Was honey. You haven’t even seen each other For a month Or two. The thought just irks me. And, like the over-bitten Inside hollows of my cheek, I continue to nibble On what is left of our Two-minute conversation And fume… …And perhaps bask in the Afterglow. See how he thinks Of you? O’ what of his cruel assessment When his tongue was merely tied And could barely Coat the word ‘beautiful’ from his Harsh goodbye. O’ what of the fact that the word Was left out altogether? …………….Oh. Well, go on. Call him back. And Give him an ear spanking. |
Submitted on 2007-10-30 20:58:30 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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| And if you ask me how I'm feeling Don't tell me you're too blind to see | Posted on 2009-10-30 00:00:00 | by GuessWho | [ Reply to This ] | We've known each other for so long | Your heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it Inside we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it | Posted on 2009-10-30 00:00:00 | by GuessWho | [ Reply to This ] | Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down | Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you | Posted on 2009-10-30 00:00:00 | by GuessWho | [ Reply to This ] | I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling | Gotta make you understand | Posted on 2009-10-30 00:00:00 | by GuessWho | [ Reply to This ] | We're no strangers to love | You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy | Posted on 2009-10-30 00:00:00 | by GuessWho | [ Reply to This ] | I'll have to agree with Venia on the splitting of the words. It was a bit distracting on a few, loosing intensity you built up. | This was very well written and awesomely worded! It made me laugh a bit. Yes. Men do deserve their ear spankings....often.  <3 Awesome write! | Posted on 2007-11-01 00:00:00 | by Maki | [ Reply to This ] | Yeah, I deserve an ear spanking every now and then, but my girlfriend prefers to pretend to ignore me. Or she tickles me. This was pretty funny and the title kinda catches your eye. Over all I enjoyed it, I do think you said O too much at the end. It was very well written and I enjoyed reading it. It catches the sweetness of relationships and is basically an excuse to call him back. | Magic Dragon. | Posted on 2007-11-01 00:00:00 | by Magic Dragon | [ Reply to This ] | Haha. Um. I'm sorry if it was me! (Once again trying to find that I'm in the poem). Analytically speaking, it has a very unique style about it. I'm not really sure the correlation between the first lines and the middle lines...it seems you have too different trains of thought. As with Lucy, I like the "nibbling" addition and the phrasing of the fifth stanza. It's just well worded? I'm lame...hahaha. I hear your voice most in the line "What perversion of the truth!" Haha. I can imagine you saying it nearly perfectly coupled with a kind shove :) | I really like these short poems you've begun to write with more regularity. Love you! Andy | Posted on 2007-11-01 00:00:00 | by Olah89 | [ Reply to This ] | Hee hee. | I can totally hear your voice in this one. It's nice to read something you've written that has 'you' written all over it... ;-) & I really adore the way you described what's going on here. this part caught my attention the most: "The thought just irks me. And, like the over-bitten Inside hollows of my cheek, I continue to nibble On what is left of our Two-minute conversation And fume…" I bite the insides of my cheeks ALL the time. and the last part? Brilliant. Ahhh! I really like this Suven!!! -Lucy | Posted on 2007-10-30 00:00:00 | by LucyDiamond | [ Reply to This ] | hm. amusing. In the immortal words of my mother | "Men are pigs" and the majority of them deserve ear spankings, certainly. Overall I really liked this. It was forceful and made a clear point, and the ending made me smile. The only thing I didn't like was the way you split up your lines. Some of them are good, but some of them felt sort of choppy to me. Otherwise this was really nice. keep writing ~Venia | Posted on 2007-10-30 00:00:00 | by Venia | [ Reply to This ] | |
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