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    dots Submission Name: Where's The Truth?dots

    Author: Survivor_Dean
    ASL Info:    42/M/Minnesota
    Elite Ratio:    2.02 - 165/186/124
    Words: 147
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 757
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 864


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhere's The Truth?dots

    I look around what do I see
    My happiness just can’t be
    Every time I start to rise
    I get hurt by someone’s lies

    It seems the truth can’t be found
    The lies and deceit are all around
    Why this is I don’t understand
    Truth shouldn’t be too much to demand

    People used to believe that lying was a sin
    Now they say whatever it takes to ensure they win
    But victory won by a bunch of lies
    Is hollow at best I might surmise

    I won’t lie to achieve my goal
    I would rather keep my soul
    The lies have hurt me too many times
    They’re the reason I write these rhymes

    And spill my feelings through this pen
    Hoping my words will help other men
    Know that they are not alone
    And they don’t have to be hard as stone

    Submitted on 2007-10-30 21:18:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I think the strongest stanza in this poem is the last one. The rhyming started to become more unique and less cliché. I think most of your poem lacks showing the reader what is going on, instead you tell them for the most part. Though towards the end is where you really start to pick up. "And spill my feelings though this pen" is probably the best line in this poem. The word 'spill' make a great image of what is going on.
    | Posted on 2007-10-31 00:00:00 | by IEggman7 | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this is reli gd lol i felt i culd realte as i know how u feel
    | Posted on 2007-10-31 00:00:00 | by hillynm | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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