Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Hopedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: strike three
    ASL Info:    32/m/Ethiopia
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 49/54/28
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 697
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 587



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHopedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Broken people; broken world.
    A scar lies hidden in everyone you know.
    Striving people, striving perfection,
    Striving world, striving illusion.
    Strive people for that elusive god,
    You never know when you strike a chord.
    Slip and fall, stand back tall,
    Eyes wide open, listen for the call.
    Faith the bait; bait the fate,
    Hope and faith, stand up straight.
    Slope, grope, choke, then hope,
    Luck might fall in a lucky stroke.
    Blessed hope to temper time,
    To hope sprinkled sweet until you die.




    Submitted on 2007-11-03 10:22:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      There was alot of.. rhyme and alliteration it was a very condensed piece, not going to far into detail... Time seems almost as if it is an after thought.. and hope seems to make its apperence at teh end but, then agian, I guess that is when it always shows up.
    | Posted on 2007-11-03 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    152090

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Shi written by ShyOne
    written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Push written by JanePlane
    AI written by poetotoe
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha
    Every..... written by jackz
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Cover written by saartha
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    written by Daniel Barlow
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry