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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: This Teasingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: sunsetserenity
    ASL Info:    21/f
    Elite Ratio:    6.49 - 23/17/12
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Prose/Longing
    Total Views: 516
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 676



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThis Teasingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I can see the little girl chasing her dreams like butterflies in the field. She's never quite able to catch up to them, for the butterflies are too fast for her tiny legs. I watch as she laughs, and runs even though she'll never have them to hold. She smiles when they come close and tickle her nose, teasing her. I can see that she likes to be teased.

    I stand alone, watching the little girl until she disappears with the butterflies. Chasing her dreams.

    Sometimes, I feel like her. Chasing dreams I know I can never have. But I like it when they stop to tickle my nose.

    Teasing me.

    It feels nice.




    Submitted on 2007-11-05 18:17:28     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is a nice piece, although I disagree with the sentiment, I think that any dream that we can dream can be captured, it just takes patience, vision, passion, hope and some hard work. Ok a lot of hard work :p

    But yes, I like this, the example of the girl and butterfly is very apt to describe how you feel, and the whole write feels lightly depressing? It's confident without being brash, open without being see-through, and most importantly, it captures the eye, the mind and the heart.

    So yes, bravo.

    ~Keiran~
    | Posted on 2007-11-05 00:00:00 | by Keiran | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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