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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Black Skydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: dreamer_s_angst
    Elite Ratio:    2.93 - 4/5/5
    Words: 89
    Class/Type: Poetry/Lostfriend
    Total Views: 129
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 608



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBlack Skydots
    -------------------------------------------


    The sky is clear
    but the stars don't shine.
    The moon, a thin sliver
    like a teardrop flling from her eyes.

    Clear, yes, clear is the midnight sky
    but fogged, too, with sadness.
    The twinkling stars are gone
    from her beautiful eyes
    now bland, dead, empty.

    Nothing, the pulse
    of her heart in those eyes
    Nothing, they whisper
    to my heart in a sorrowful, monotone cry.

    Crestfallen, the countenance
    of those blue-gray eyes
    Fallen, are the stars
    from the black, black sky.




    Submitted on 2007-11-08 16:15:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I agree with Peggy Paris. There is definately emptiness that is felt. It is very and easy to understand.

    Kat

    Oh the last line on the first stanza I think you meant to put falling not flling other then that it is a perfect piece.
    | Posted on 2007-11-09 00:00:00 | by Katlord | [ Reply to This ]
      You've captured the emptiness perfectly. Your metaphors were clearly understandable and deeply felt. I shall read more of your poems. Sharon
    | Posted on 2007-11-09 00:00:00 | by Peggy Paris | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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