Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password


Author: Foreseer
ASL Info:    20/F/In Love
Elite Ratio:    2.73 - 156 /86 /23
Words: 82
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1227
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 493


Just wrote in, not sure what I was trying to say though. :P.


All the colors fade away
it has come at last to be the day,
I fall.

Sight and sound slip afar,
a new darkness like a scar,

Present warmth of tomorrow's yesterday,
by my heart, kept at bay,

What I know means nothing yet,
frozen by the rhythms set,

One more sunset to behold,
then there'll be nothing but the cold,

Submitted on 2007-11-11 23:36:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  First–edit it. (grammar, spelling, etc)

Second, never name a poem Forever.
| Posted on 2007-11-12 00:00:00 | by Zaftigical | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?