Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: To the roof.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: tryst
    Elite Ratio:    2.48 - 8/20/16
    Words: 79
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 443
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 527



    Description:
       This piece just kinda flowed, I'm not sure where it came from, but I wish I could write this easily more often, it took less than five minutes to put it all together.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTo the roof.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm not quite to the roof,
    but I've already fallen,
    I do what I must,
    I'm one of the chosen,

    I've run out of reasons,
    to fail yet again,
    so I'll be successful,
    bringing life to an end,

    I step forward once more,
    plant foot firmly on air,
    and continue walk,
    they look up in despair,

    As I fall to the ground,
    I close my eyes and smile,
    I can overcome failure,
    once in a while.




    Submitted on 2007-11-14 02:19:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was a great poem Ryan!
    But I think this stanza needs a little work?

    "I step forward once more,
    plant foot firmly on air,
    and continue walk,
    they look up in despair,"

    I maybe wrong?
    Love your work!!! Keep it up
    Kelley Frost
    | Posted on 2007-11-21 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    152855

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Cover written by saartha
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Records I written by Raphael
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Love written by saartha
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry