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Author: love gone wrong
ASL Info:    27/m/colorado
Elite Ratio:    2.14 - 337 /381 /42
Words: 24
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 2089
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 176


just a little something....nothing special


hot needle in the eye
blood red sky
stake through the heart
mountains split apart
corkscrew in the ear
one salty, black tear

Submitted on 2004-02-04 22:56:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  hmmm... ya lost me there at the end. I'm usually a huge fan of short poems, but in this case... I'd like to know more, and I think the poem would be improved by extending it. GREAT imagery. "salty black tear..." very nice. One wonders how dark the soul must be for the eyes to cry black tears. <><
| Posted on 2004-02-05 00:00:00 | by WorththeWait | [ Reply to This ]
  lol i don't know if it's beyond me or if it's just surpose to say what it says lol
i mean it's wonderful ideas and metaphors of pain contrasted against nature that applies to both because the sky and mountains and things in nature are powerful and when they are changed, then what ever is changing them like in this poem "emotions" has to be even more powerful

Great Poem
| Posted on 2004-02-04 00:00:00 | by Soulraven | [ Reply to This ]
  Not one of your best. but alot of good imagery and SO bitter.(another person would say that's bad, but a bitter person usually has such a saucy sense of humor, lol).
| Posted on 2004-02-04 00:00:00 | by Voodoo_Lounge | [ Reply to This ]

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