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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Seeingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BlueTorcher
    Elite Ratio:    7.33 - 65/34/38
    Words: 181
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 93
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1078



    Description:
       Something that made me thin a little or LOT



    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSeeingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Your hurting me,dont you see
    Your hurting me daily
    Every second of every moment were together

    Your hurting me cant you see
    The pain youve caused
    The tears of pain

    Cant you see your hurting me
    Or is it nothing but a game
    A game where pain hangs a thread
    And peace by another

    Cant you see your hurting me
    Can you feel the pain I feel inside
    It makes me wonder
    Sometimes
    How I stay alive

    Cant you see your hurting me
    Day in and day out
    I try to hide the pain I feel
    But it alawys gets out

    Cant you see your hurting me
    When you look at me
    Its like Ive been ripped open
    For only you to see

    Cant you see the pain I feel
    When you come close
    My world turns upside down
    Clouding my judgement
    Because when your near
    Oh when your near

    I just
    I just cant think clear

    A message from me to you.




    Submitted on 2007-11-23 14:54:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
       That was good. It pulls on you, the way it
    was intended. It was raw ..................But
    I was left a little wanting. Hmmmmmm

    I dont know why? mabey some sort of
    reason, or point. What drives this peace?
    Keep it up........................!

    Late, Joshua
    | Posted on 2007-12-27 00:00:00 | by oononotthatguy | [ Reply to This ]
      You've really captured the rawness that is often too much a part of love. The poem was powerful and the voice very direct. Overall, this made for a very emotive poem.
    | Posted on 2007-11-23 00:00:00 | by Speacenik | [ Reply to This ]
      Cool man, I felt like ive been ripped open so you did your job, I hate having feelings for the people who hurt your feelings I think anyone can relate.
    Thank you
    Diablo Tapitio
    | Posted on 2007-11-23 00:00:00 | by Diablo Tapitio | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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