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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Life Without "The"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: SanctityExposed
    ASL Info:    25
    Elite Ratio:    3.98 - 48/66/40
    Words: 137
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 658
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1099



    Description:
       This piece was inspired by the provided image. Also, I challenged myself to not use the word "the", as it is used all too often in poetry. It was interesting, but proved time-worthy.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLife Without "The"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    O'er centuries passed
    sky of brilliant jade.
    Moondust fell from heavens
    unbeknownst to man.

    Hail towards life eternal
    as waters trembled in fear;
    one enigma scatters to take
    shelter in raging waterfalls.

    Reflection on moving glass,
    I see who?
    Soiled feet on darkened sand,
    withered hooks outstretched needily.

    Settled stroke of paint,
    cradled brush moved across
    momentous figures of life.
    Colouring Earth with a limited palette.

    Creation by eyes of age,
    deductions ceased due to infamy.
    Only one right world,
    only a single insight.

    This world.
    A world of mine own fatality.
    I shall die within this realm,
    of moonshine reveries,
    hollowed by barbarity.

    Blackened velvet strewn in clouds,
    hues proportioned to Gods themselves...
    My sky falls down and ears are athirst,
    to hear moondust collide into still waters.




    Submitted on 2007-11-26 14:51:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I loved the imagery in this piece. There was so much of it, and every image brought to mind was beautiful and...captivating. I hung on to every word in this poem and even though I agree that it did seem like pieces it was a very well written poem. Happy faces!

    Duv
    | Posted on 2008-02-04 00:00:00 | by Draumrkopa | [ Reply to This ]
      I really loved this poems imagery. And the diction you used just rolled off my tongue, I actually had to mouth with it.

    "sky of brilliant jade.
    Moondust fell from heavens"

    Is one of my favorite images in the entire poem, and matched with the picture above it, it really helps get the setting of the poem into your head. I want to be able to take more excerpts i like from the poem, but I fear that if i attempt that I'll just end up coping and pasting the entire poem. So, ill just let you know that I valued every word, and the images those words brought to mind. This deserves a +Fav.
    | Posted on 2008-01-09 00:00:00 | by Passionbyapathy | [ Reply to This ]
      Bravo!
    I doubt I could complete a piece without using the word "the."

    I'm not sure if I'm grasping the whole concept, though.
    The poem seems more like seperate bits and pieces rather than a complete thought or idea.
    However, it is likely it is just beyond me.
    (Please know I don't mean any of that negatively.)


    Your words are very thought provoking.

    -E.

    PS. That picture is incredibly beautiful. =]
    | Posted on 2007-11-26 00:00:00 | by Puzzle_d_Box | [ Reply to This ]


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    153592

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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