Thoughts on Winter by redthewitch

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Submission Name: Thoughts on Winter dots

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Author:	redthewitch
ASL Info:	28/f/us
Elite Ratio:	4.06 - 260/165/25
Words:	61

Class/Type:	Poetry/
Total Views:	84
Average Vote:	5.0000
Bytes:	372

Description:
It was an effort.

Thoughts on Winter dots

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the frozen landscape is black, white,
and every shade of grey in between
branches bowing to the wind
here and there a stray leaf clings
to a former life
day after day
no sun in sight
winter monotony
sinks into the bone
under an
endlessendlessendless
sky of white

Submitted on 2007-11-30 20:36:21 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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||| Comments |||
  Great poem!
I would change this line some how
"endlessendlessendless "
Kind of stops the flow of the poem I think?
Anyway great write!!! Thanks for sharing.
Kelley Frost
| Posted on 2007-12-07 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]
  It feels jagged to me. The description isn't bad, but I almost wish it was worded differently.
| Posted on 2007-12-05 00:00:00 | by gavinspikenard | [ Reply to This ]
  good description
| Posted on 2007-12-01 00:00:00 | by iaida | [ Reply to This ]

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