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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Raindots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: saartha
    ASL Info:    27/F/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 230/385/134
    Words: 79
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 753
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 546



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRaindots
    -------------------------------------------


    We speak best in the rain.
    All the little jags and crags
    erode away and we sink deep,
    canyon-smooth but so close--
    two shaking animals pressed
    haunch to haunch, breath
    to neck, two children who fear nothing
    but lightning, and mothers who know
    lightning is nothing to fear.

    But itís sweet,
    itís sweet
    to watch the colors bleed
    and dilute, eyes grey and mouths
    pale like half-moons or falling stars
    we canít help but catch
    and wish on.




    Submitted on 2007-12-03 22:33:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I enjoy the thought of rain changing the sounds we make...and the way we approach speaking.

    This was my favorite part:

    "But itís sweet,
    itís sweet
    to watch the colors bleed
    and dilute, eyes grey and mouths
    pale like half-moons or falling stars
    we canít help but catch
    and wish on."


    I can almost see a tiny face pressed to the glass, watching the rain fall.

    Good read.
    Thanks for sharing it.
    | Posted on 2007-12-23 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, I'm not sure what to say actually.

    Nice to see some childhood reminisces in this poem:

    " two children who fear nothing
    but lightning, and mothers who know
    lightning is nothing to fear." --> I don't know what it is with little kids and thunderstorms, but they get so scared of them. I can't even remember the first thunderstorm I've ever heard. I don't even remember if I was ever scared of them. All I know is that they don't scare me now.

    "falling stars
    we canít help but catch
    and wish on." --> catch a falling star and put it in your pocket...stars are a wonder to children, aren't they? On clear nights I like to stare at the sky and contemplate God's power and the magnitude of his works. Reminds me of the Bible verse where it says he calls each and every star by name...and there are so many! Many more than we can see. Billions, trillions, quadrillions...septillions!

    This poem had a somewhat animal and instinctual mood because of these lines:
    "two shaking animals pressed
    haunch to haunch, breath
    to neck"
    I liked those lines. They were probably my favourite lines in this poem. Something about animals just makes me feel good inside. Possibly because I'm connected to nature.

    "But itís sweet,
    itís sweet
    to watch the colors bleed
    and dilute" --> makes me think of an artist pouring water on his painting. Abstract!

    Other than that, I'm not sure what else to say. Excellent poem!

    | Posted on 2007-12-04 00:00:00 | by AsiaticFox | [ Reply to This ]


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