Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Three-Eight-Two-Fivedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Synchronomyst
    ASL Info:    22/m
    Elite Ratio:    4.25 - 1/2/2
    Words: 362
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 874
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 3118



    Description:
       ...to give a brief overview of the piece, it highlights the somewhat unfair perceptions that certain women get from men and particularly other women because of how they speak, how they dress, who they affiliate themselves with, their complexion and a myriad of other completely trivial factors used for incredibly myopic deductions. In this piece, however, I tried to do it through the eyes of the ones who condemn...so there's little mockery or satire, rather just the jaded perception of the voice.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThree-Eight-Two-Fivedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Scrawled over bathroom Walls
    And toilet stalls,
    Your tarnished name
    And your dual lives.
    It always says,
    "Call for a good time
    Eight-Six-Eight
    Seven-One-One..."

    Three-Eight-Two-Five.


    Everyone looks at you through the silhouette parade
    Traipsing before your table,
    Through the din of death
    Protruding past your teeth.
    The flame climbing it's way
    Up the cigarette shaft,
    Burning it's own wake on the way
    To the top.

    Your flesh is obscured
    By such troublesome fabric...
    Threads that advertise
    Your anxious availability.
    Your make-up done
    To picturesque-perfection
    To be preserved in megapixels
    And distributed like
    Loose change.

    But truly, at what cost?
    Everyone has heard the rumours;
    Ignoring circumstance
    A single cent
    Can make one a whore
    of unmatchable extravagance.

    Still, though
    honesty of this nature
    Only escapes in murmurs
    ("I won't deny...that one guy...
    Three-Eight-Two-Five...)

    But please, go ahead
    Reside among your secrets, besides
    I've got ten dollars
    That says you're worthless.

    But there are always whispers
    Exchanged between the words...
    ("Have you heard about her?
    She sleeps in the beds
    Of bankers and bank robbers
    Of magistrates and miscreants
    And sits comfortably
    In the throbbing lap of luxury.
    Always in church
    And always on her knees
    But I swear to God
    She know nothing about piety.")

    ...of (dis)honest approval and awe...
    Your smiles hides
    A parasitic irony that lies beneath...
    The dimples on your cheek a target;
    Reservoirs for the lusts of lesser men.

    How does one get past
    All the fabricated infamy
    Of a name smeared like bargain lipstick
    Across the corners of your lips?
    Where every pissant
    of a misnomer
    of a man
    has proudly
    claimed
    to have
    kissed?

    He writes your number...
    A dozen leave a signature
    All co-signitaries
    To your exaggerated imprudence
    But...
    It's gone far beyond human proclivity
    To pervert innocence and beauty;
    It's all based in spin and scandal...
    It's all based
    In the nature of your sins

    Touched until dirty
    You get around like currency;
    The current communal indulgence...
    I've gotten dollars
    That have said you're worthless.

    Darling...
    Your moles look better in monochrome.




    Submitted on 2007-12-08 07:59:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      It's so scathing, Syn. I like it a lot.

    It's crushingly brutal and unabashedly honest.

    Goddamnit man post something that I can rip apart for you. This is something I want to print out and hang on my wall...

    You wouldn't mind, would you?

    The phone number part was [censored] amazing. Just [censored] brilliant.

    | Posted on 2007-12-15 00:00:00 | by Fizzlethorpe | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    154124

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry