I have problems,
heh, what a funny opening line.
If I were reading this and someone else had written it I'd have closed the window by now.
Seriously, I have problems though.
I seek destructive relationships. I see that I do but I lie to myself just long enough for me to get attached. It's like I crave pain.
I think It goes back to my father, I once heard that if a child has an abusive parent while growing up that they'll eventually seek out those same behaviors.
I'm a living testament to that theory. I'm an emotional-masochist.
I often wonder what I can do, who to turn to.
Hardly anyone can grasp the severity of my self-loathing and despicable nature.
They nod and smile, "I understand how you feel"
"I've been there"
"You'll be alright, it's all in your head"
Well now, right here, in this dinky little freewrite, I'll strike back.
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First off, you don't fucking understand me. You have no fucking idea who I am, so shut the fuck up.
Yes I know she manipulated me -I- -fucking- -wanted- -it-. deep within my subconscious it fulfilled me, it fueled me, it sustained me.
Second, to you little sluts out there (Hayley, Laura, Ashley, Kim, Teal, Nikki, and that one chick whose name I can't remember)
Two words, Fuck off. . .
You think you won? lmao! seriously, you think you came out on top? well let me clue you all in on something. I sought you out not because you were pretty or funny or smart. In fact some of you were none of the above.
I sought you out to hurt myself, I told you I loved you and let myself believe it because my subconscious knew that it would bring about more pain in the end.
So, dating me was an insult! In order to qualify for my love you'd have to be a sick narcissistic whore (literally) who fucks every guy in sight.
And allow me to congratulate you on your successes as my tools of self-destruction. You really all outdid yourselves!
But sadly, all good things must come to an end. I believe I've had enough self destruction for one lifetime. So it's no more sluts for me!
wooohoo! |
Submission Name: American Girls
