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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Please Save Medots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Katlord
    ASL Info:    24/no thanks/my room
    Elite Ratio:    2.17 - 375/199/101
    Words: 154
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Depressed
    Total Views: 659
    Average Vote:    4.5000
    Bytes: 1085



    Description:
       Ehhh I just kind of through this together I know it needs some work.. Any advice would be apprecaited.. enjoy.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPlease Save Medots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is darkness,
    the air is thick,
    I can feel my heart pounding,
    deep in my chest.

    The world is spinning,
    nothing seems to make sense,
    life is a blurr,
    both the past and the present.

    A small amount of light,
    entires into the choas,
    it's tossed anround,
    thrown into my face.

    When will it stop,
    please save me,
    very soon I fear that,
    I won't be able to breath

    I'm being soffacted,
    by my own insanity,
    won't somebody help me,
    Save me please.

    Before it's too late,
    I need you to,
    gather up your strength,
    before I'm gone.

    Lost in madness,
    unsure of whats what,
    can I plea insanity,
    lock me away throw out the key.

    Please I don't want this anymore,
    I want only to be free,
    to live in my own world,
    unafraid and unseen.

    Save me,
    Save me,
    Please.....




    Submitted on 2007-12-12 17:33:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      this poem was cool it did kinda sound thrown together but to me those are the best ones, it sounds like it came right out of your heart or off the top of your head
    | Posted on 2008-02-14 00:00:00 | by Mirado | [ Reply to This ]
      Did you have to put this particular picture with it :-) I found myself holding my breath and imagining myself spiralling down deeper and deeper into a dark blue icy cold ocean - getting more and more entangled on the way down and desperately needing to go up for air.

    The words actually build up a pressure that demands to be released and it eventually feels as if my head will burst...

    Powerful words and very cleverly done.

    Excellent writing!
    | Posted on 2008-01-24 00:00:00 | by Beulah | [ Reply to This ]
      unafraid and unseen, what i wish for everyday. This poem as you said seems a little bit too thrown together, maybe a bit of sprusing can be made. But other then that loved it

    Cry
    | Posted on 2008-01-17 00:00:00 | by WhY-dO-yOu-CrY | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked the flow...i liked the 2nd last para..very well composed..keep up the good work!!!!!!!!
    | Posted on 2007-12-21 00:00:00 | by N0shin | [ Reply to This ]


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