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What if (complete)

Author: No Talent
ASL Info:    24/m/Ny
Elite Ratio:    4.12 - 263 /178 /31
Words: 252
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 2063
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1465


Juss lemme kno if you like or not what u thought of it how it made you feel and what u think its about

What if (complete)

What if...
Just cant seem to see it all clearly..
What if the world stopped turning
what if the moon stopped shining
what if my love for you slowly died out
would you remember me
and the love I once felt or would you pretend to repent
even scream and shout
eyes closed to my words, living thru your own world
crying to me like the blind to reality like blind to the truth
blatantly starting thru eyes that lie to me, but through others, only you..
Only you can see the truth
The truth lying beneath us all
the truth most will never know
crying and weeping as tears drop like frost upon the snow
the snow hiding what we wish you will never know
hiding my true feelings and what if....
Something you may never know
what if...
I believed, believed in you
believed your lies and held them all true
held you in my arms denied the fact ... you lied
and how deep those scares lashed back
Still what happens if I stay here and remain with you
living in your lies crying through those eyes
slowly...slowly dying going blind then insane all in one instant...
I’m lost
Paying the price of my own cost
as I marvel at my own fate
I deserve this
but ...
What if ....Could this really be my fate?

Submitted on 2004-06-25 15:05:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  This was a sad piece and it seemed about a person who just feels screwed over and is losing faith in good things happening. It was well put together. Love,Peace,Joy!
| Posted on 2005-07-22 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
  never seen something to bring sadness and talk about love. what if.... is a big question everybody has for many subjects and ideas, and your write told the side of scared to love and wanting someone special but still having that what if... mentality good job
| Posted on 2005-07-22 00:00:00 | by solemnpen | [ Reply to This ]
  this was something man.. i enjoyed the emotion you put into this... and i love question pieces, i like making people think myself.. but you get those i don't know hundred something fools who are to stupid to make comments... but thats another story.. there was some real talent here b.. maybe you should get a new handle.. something that fits you... good job
| Posted on 2005-08-14 00:00:00 | by solemnpen | [ Reply to This ]
  My first reaction when I read this poem was an extreme feeling of pain and sadness. Maybe even a little confusion... I like this poem alot, and it ... well, I can't really say what it's about... When I re-read it, I think I may know what it's about, but then I'm not so sure. All I know is that it seems to radiate pain, loss, confusion, and anger. Something about a girl you loved, or thought you loved, but she... betrayed you? Lied to you? I think I like wondering what it's about... It makes it mysterious >.< and it gives me something to think about. Well, I'm puting this in my favs... Keep on writing Byes~
<3 Jade
| Posted on 2004-06-27 00:00:00 | by RealityTears | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi, you are at the bottom of the page now, several views and no comments. You have a lot of issues here. I don't know what you want in the way of comments, but let me know and I will tear it up and show you everything I see. I won't be cruel, but I won't sugar coat it either. Your call.
| Posted on 2004-06-25 00:00:00 | by Sandburg | [ Reply to This ]

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