Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Realismdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Diablo Tapitio
    ASL Info:    30
    Elite Ratio:    3.08 - 85/111/62
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 1150
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 943



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRealismdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The world spins around so fast,
    we forget lessons taught in the past.
    We are free and we are true,
    the poor are beaten black and blue.

    technology has killed survival skills,
    reality replaced with cheap little thrills,
    gasses in the atmosphere fill our childrens lungs,
    then companys will sell them drugs.

    Look at the earth, burning more everyday,
    look at us ignoring what our scientists say.
    I just dont understand how we can cover our eyes,
    and continue to believe in political lies.

    We dont take any action,we never do,
    nothing new to me,nothing new to you,
    and we will continue our distruction,
    without fear of reprocution.

    So go ahead you dont care,
    pollute the water,distroy the air,
    kill it all burn all the trees,
    one day the earth will shake us off like fleas.




    Submitted on 2007-12-17 23:01:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I love the last statement the earth will shake us off like fleas, the earth always has a way to cleanse itself and it will of us in do time.
    | Posted on 2010-06-03 00:00:00 | by metallichick786 | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, I was very impressed with this piece. I think a lot of people do care, but really who's gonna listen to us...
    I am glad you have taking a stand for what you care about. keep up the excellent work.
    You use your words well...I don't see that this piece needs any changes it's perfect the way it is unfortunately I can't say the same about our mother earth :(

    Dez
    | Posted on 2010-04-07 00:00:00 | by Stargazer89 | [ Reply to This ]
      AWSOME, I always said the Earth will shake her flees. Nicely done and said. I really wouldn't change a thing. I'm glad someone finially stood up for MOTHER EARTH.
    By the way,,, I do CARE.


    blessed be

    illusions
    | Posted on 2008-03-28 00:00:00 | by illusions35904 | [ Reply to This ]
      Straightforward, to the point, hard hitting and sadly true. You write with a righteous indignation that is needed for this kind of piece, and it comes through bold and clear.

    If I had to make recommendations, they would be:

    "Burning our earth, more everyday,
    as we ignore what our scientists say.
    And somehow we still cover our eyes,
    and continue to believe in political lies."

    Just a taste thing.

    The last stanza is ripping, full of that slowly despairing rage that seems to engulf those that do care. Though it feels at times like a preacher on a street corner, screaming that you'll burn in hell and somehow hoping that will convince you to listen.

    I might also:

    "So go ahead if you dont care,
    pollute the water and destroy the air,
    kill it all and burn all the trees,
    Just don't look surprised when we're brought to our knees
    or
    And we shall fall from the dog like fleas"

    Anywho, I very much like this. Keep it up,

    James (aka eh8)

    | Posted on 2008-01-03 00:00:00 | by FallenGrace | [ Reply to This ]
       You have a role with your words. You made
    your point with your words. It was put put well.

    Hmmmmmmm Ya I liked it. But ya "Its The End Of The World As We Know It,.........But I Fell
    Fine"................."I Dont Mind"

    Ya Ha Ha.........

    Alright Late.
    Joshua
    | Posted on 2007-12-23 00:00:00 | by oononotthatguy | [ Reply to This ]
      THIS FLOWED AMAZINGLY, most poems seem forced, sometimes mine, but this flowed perfectly, there were no mishaps. And your lines are very uinique, some of them i would never have even thought of, great job^_^
    | Posted on 2007-12-19 00:00:00 | by WhY-dO-yOu-CrY | [ Reply to This ]
      I must say that I really liked this work of yours. I spend some of my time writing poems just like these, but you've captured the very core of the problem, and I really love that.

    Too bad we can't save the world anymore.

    Mother's so past saving, it's depressing.

    keep up all of the very good work

    <3
    Rose
    | Posted on 2007-12-18 00:00:00 | by Queen_of_spades | [ Reply to This ]
      "The world spins around so fast,
    we forget lessons taught in the past."

    I love this lines. They seem like something I would write. Anyway this is a good poem. The ending is great!
    | Posted on 2007-12-18 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]
      i like it a lot it is a very eye opening poem to what society dose everyday without even thinking twice if we all just opend our eyes every once in a wile we would really see were just destroying our selfs
    | Posted on 2007-12-17 00:00:00 | by bleeding_words | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    154557

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Bond written by saartha
    Summer written by layDsayD
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Linger written by saartha
    Wavelength written by saartha
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    To written by SavedDragon
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry