[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Stuck in my headdots

    Author: Midnight Shadow
    ASL Info:    22/f
    Elite Ratio:    2.24 - 47/151/126
    Words: 101
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 698
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 657


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsStuck in my headdots

    Every touch and every whisper
    makes my mind scream
    'just kiss her
    she's the girl of your dreams
    why can't you see that
    you're in love with that girl'
    i study your smell
    and i study the way
    the light glistens in your eyes
    i can feel your hair against my cheek
    your leg wrapped with mine in the sheets
    our arms and hands softening to the touch
    and weary to cross
    our eyes locked and our whispers
    in each other's ears only for one to hear
    laughter, flirting, lying in bed
    hello stranger, you're stuck in my head

    Submitted on 2007-12-20 01:14:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Wow... I don't even care that this piece doesn't rhyme, it's beautiful. Rarely do I get the pleasure of coming across a love poem from a guy's perspective, and I'm very glad I stumbled upon this one. Normally I would suggest more detail, but for some reason the vaguenss of this piece adds more interest for the reader.

    I congratulate you on a job well done, and I hope to see more from you!
    | Posted on 2007-12-20 00:00:00 | by black_beauty18 | [ Reply to This ]
      It doesn't rhyme, but it kind of flows... I really liked it because you put something so beautiful into words. Love is really hard to write about, and you managed to capture a part of it. Good job!
    | Posted on 2007-12-20 00:00:00 | by emanol | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]