Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Der De Doo My Frienddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: insphered soul
    ASL Info:    19/M/ Hmmm?
    Elite Ratio:    6.49 - 450/382/94
    Words: 62
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 804
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 385



    Description:
       Isn't it hard to keep going day after day? When you already know what the future is going to be like but it just takes so much time for it to happen? That's how I feel, and this has nothing to do with that.

    Just thought I'd talk about how I feel :)


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDer De Doo My Frienddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I want to leave this place
    Go far away and be alone
    in a shack off the coast
    or a cave in the mountains

    I feel like I'm drowning
    holding on to reality
    watching it all fall apart
    as the enemy of my beliefs

    If I leave here now
    don't hate me ever
    just know that you
    were my inspiration




    Submitted on 2007-12-27 10:32:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Okay, i must add:


    The "Der de doo my friend" is not only annoying as hell, it's mispunctuated.



    If i skip over reading THOSE bits, i really like this poem.
    | Posted on 2008-03-05 00:00:00 | by GoKart Mozart | [ Reply to This ]
      mad cool poem. for the past few weeks ive been feeling like going to a desereted place with no people what so ever where noone can find me.

    it would be so nice. no pesky mortals..

    yo laterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
    Grim

    | Posted on 2008-02-04 00:00:00 | by DaGrimReaperess | [ Reply to This ]
      ....this is retarded. lol.

    i like the last actual stanza i like though.




    it seems kind of angsty and emo. <_<


    whatsa matta fa' you?


    +Moz+
    | Posted on 2007-12-27 00:00:00 | by GoKart Mozart | [ Reply to This ]
      Your "Der dee doo my friend" line makes this seem like it's nonchalant and trivial, a "meh, whatever" type thing, but really, it's an illusion, isn't it? Or, at least, you show hope that's fast fading away, to be replaced by uncertainty and that feeling of wanting to escape. I feel like this a lot, that it'd be nice to be a hermit in a cave, but I think the reality would be much, much different--cut off from your friends and family, from real-life responsibilities... plus, I don't think there's much in the way of portaloos or showers in most inhospitable mountain ranges...

    Love and beliefs change. It's hard to stomach when your world seems like it's crumbling before your very eyes, I know, but things happen for a reason. At least, I like to think so.

    Anyway, about time I left you a comment...

    Take care of yourself, young man
    | Posted on 2007-12-27 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    154986

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    You read free written by poetotoe
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Fasade written by jackz
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Love written by saartha
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    no words for how graceful you are in this moment written by Daniel Barlow
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Every..... written by jackz
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Yes written by poetotoe
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Carry written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry