[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Toucheddots

    Author: CaughtRedhanded
    ASL Info:    18/F/TN
    Elite Ratio:    4.23 - 94/41/22
    Words: 125
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 717
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 764

       This poem is for Bubby

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Youve shared with me a piece of you
    And left me wanting more
    I dont remember a time in my life
    Being touched like this before
    Your words reflect a gentle heart
    Thats strong and real and true
    The more you talk the more I know
    I need to be near you
    I want to hear your voice
    Hold your hand and be your friend
    Make time to be together
    I want our lives to blend
    I dream of the moments wed share
    Held close in a loving embrace
    Sharing our thoughts of the future
    Lost in our intimate space
    Id savor the scent of your presence
    And finally drift off to sleep
    Holding memories created within me
    Mine forever to cherish and keep

    Submitted on 2008-01-08 08:43:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      What an excellent and tender love poem! I'm impressed that you provided an excellent structure, and excellent rhyme and rythmn! Nice work, lovely lady!
    | Posted on 2008-05-10 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, usually I'm not a big fan of poems that rhyme, but you did really good. You got out a lot that you wanted to say and it didn't seem as though everything you say was constricted to trying to keep the rhyme scheme going.
    I would love to read some free verse written by you. You have a lot to say and I think that you would write some incredible poetry if you were to try it. Just an idea.

    | Posted on 2008-01-23 00:00:00 | by daughterofdeath | [ Reply to This ]
      very cute! i like it, but the one part,
    "I dream of the moments wed share
    Held close in a loving embrace"
    is kind of rough... it kind of mixes up the flow for that one little part. but i like the idea!
    | Posted on 2008-01-09 00:00:00 | by Kaygrl | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this, it really creates an image in the readers mind. It's still an excellent love poem, but its not a mushy gushy kissy kissy type of poem, haha. Very nice work:)
    | Posted on 2008-01-08 00:00:00 | by Mr.Seth | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]