Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: fair adodots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: williamwallace7
    ASL Info:    18/male/california
    Elite Ratio:    1.1 - 8/5/9
    Words: 86
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 838
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 469



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsfair adodots
    -------------------------------------------


    i can feel my heart dying away
    like my life from the road is starting to stray
    my heart beats and longs for what i can't reach
    the pain into my soul starts to breach
    making me breathless killing off my mind
    in this wolrd i find i am not one of a kind
    many are dying by the hands of this world
    it seems darkness is consuming us all in its swirl.
    so i bid fair ado
    hoping that the world is kinder to you




    Submitted on 2008-01-10 23:44:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i also like the way this flows but i think it could of had a little more emotions and it could of been a little longer but other than that yeah it was good i did like it
    robbie
    | Posted on 2008-01-11 00:00:00 | by robbie | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like how this poem flows, good write!
    | Posted on 2008-01-11 00:00:00 | by Nessyjane | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    155759

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry