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    dots Submission Name: Amusement Ridedots

    Author: Ari Leukos
    ASL Info:    17/Male/CA
    Elite Ratio:    4.83 - 92/134/47
    Words: 292
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 788
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1894

       Inspired by a windy night on a rolling road.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAmusement Ridedots

    He smells cooked sugar and old oil on blackened gears,
    Hears rattling and laughing and distant voices—open maws;
    Feeling nothing all along, petty joys, small lights, nor fears.

    The rest laugh at him gleefully,
    While he will say, ‘Not I, not I!’

    On the rollercoaster, they tempt their lives with fate
    And scream and close their eyes in cold fright.
    But the floor will drop, and they’re too late—
    It’s a test of faith in metal tracks and chains
    Pray the cart will stay confined to its lanes!
    Why do they laugh?
    They know inside, at least the older ones will know,
    That the cart will stay on track and slow
    And stop before the ride has ended.

    I smell the oil, and cooking chars sting my eye,
    They call this amusement and child’s play—open hands;
    Yet I can’t laugh it all away, for here… here am I.

    I notice—O Lord, can’t be true!—that there are no tracks;
    There are no rails, no chains beneath these wheels.
    Wheels; there is a wheel at my seat, and cushion on my back
    And a passenger beside me—
    For my life, I can’t recall her name.
    Even her face drifts from my mind… her name?

    The bumps rattle this cart—thu-lump, thu-lump
    The lights shine on this car, and scatter like suns.

    What will I do, though, when the floor falls out beneath me?
    For I want to close my eyes,
         and breathe deep,
         and scream,
         and fling up my arms to heaven like the child on the park ride.

    I am afraid, dear child, I am afraid!
    I want to close my eyes, but then who will drive?
    Not I, I pray, not I!

    Submitted on 2008-01-15 21:30:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This got to me just like a strange experience, the meaning of which might catch up with me sometime - since it is memorable!

    That's what I want to tell you about - the poem's success in giving a weird transition experience between rollercoaster and automobile. That effect is familiar in movies, but in verse it must be harder to do because there aren't many pieces like this, hereabouts!
    | Posted on 2008-01-15 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]

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