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    dots Submission Name: Stimulationdots

    Author: Raivn
    ASL Info:    33/f/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 1222/916/231
    Words: 158
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 508
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 975

       I haven't written in a while...and I needed to

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    This has never been about love for me
    There's just a primal connection with you
    Physically, I feel more than ever before
    And I wonder if you've felt it too

    I've never cared about relationship potential
    You and I would never work that way
    I just want to make a memory to treasure
    And to live from day to day

    You can move me with just one look
    Evoke the most incredible sensations with your hands
    And I would never go so far as to let you know it
    But I'm helpless under your command

    There's nothing more that I can really say,
    Perhaps ramble on about your eyes
    But that would just romanticize the situation
    When the truth is in between my thighs

    Bluntly put, this is just about sex
    And my desire for you
    And if you feel the need for some stimulation
    Come let me show you what I can do...

    Submitted on 2008-01-16 22:53:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      'When the truth is between my thighs.' This is blunt ! Nightrider
    | Posted on 2008-03-05 00:00:00 | by Nightrider | [ Reply to This ]
      There's nothing more that I can really say,
    Perhaps ramble on about your eyes
    But that would just romanticize the situation
    When the truth is in between my thighs

    that verse was, simply put, awesome

    as said before, the bluntness and simplicity lends itself very well to the subject matter - but it still flows well and it's an easy read. The only minor minor minor thing that is simply a matter of taste is the ellipses at the end... it feels like it should have a stronger ending to me, just a period. The End. Rawr. .

    | Posted on 2008-01-19 00:00:00 | by Cora Windover | [ Reply to This ]
      This is well written, niether too flowery, but also not too blunt. I appreciate the sentiment here, its what originally drew me to your writing. You write plainly, but with a slight edge of prose, which is very important to pieces like this.

    like you said yesterday, we may not be friends, but I still appreciate your writing style.
    | Posted on 2008-01-18 00:00:00 | by blu_kittin | [ Reply to This ]
      TYhe simple rhyme scheme and bluntness of both topic and diction, leaves little questions to be asked about the situation or relation. it was well executed and has a certain truth to it.
    | Posted on 2008-01-17 00:00:00 | by SincerWritinAsh | [ Reply to This ]

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