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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I Am...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Canadian333
    Elite Ratio:    0.19 - 0/2/2
    Words: 73
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nature
    Total Views: 712
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 424



    Description:
       The soil is talking about it self, and at the end says dont harm me, you'll harm the plants i grow.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Am...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is lots of me
    There are different kinds of me
    What am i?

    I can be hard
    I can be soft
    I can get in your way
    I can be needed by you
    What am I?

    Things live in me
    Things turn into me
    What am I?

    I can make things grow
    I can absorb things
    that kill what i grow
    What am I???

    I am the soil




    Submitted on 2008-01-17 09:53:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i think your right, i shouldn't write peoms liek this, in my head it sounded better.
    | Posted on 2008-01-17 00:00:00 | by Canadian333 | [ Reply to This ]
      Im usually not one to judge others poetry style, and I try to maintain a sort of neutral stance when critiquing poetry. I'd tell them if i liked it or not, but my advice would be neutral. I have to tell you that in my opinion though, this piece was entirely too much like a riddle to flow as a poem. It was kind of like a crippled free verse that didn't build momentum, had no sense of meter, and a complete lack of rhyme or other literary techniques. The only real captivity it instilled in me was that I was curious up until the very end as to what the poem was referring to. Although you used personification in that the soil was speaking about itself, I didn't really get that connection from it. I'm trying to be honest, and I don't want to come off as mean, but I really think you should shy away from writing another poem like this, it just doesn't flow.
    | Posted on 2008-01-17 00:00:00 | by Passionbyapathy | [ Reply to This ]

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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