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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Paralyzeddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BeautifulSoul
    ASL Info:    17/F/In
    Elite Ratio:    7.48 - 79/54/23
    Words: 67
    Class/Type: Poetry/Alone
    Total Views: 164
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 414



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsParalyzeddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm like a weed,
    choking everything in my path,
    with my unforgiving wrath.
    The day he left was the day I died,
    barely have I cried,
    for the pain was all I could feel,
    there was nothing that made me real.
    I felt like a cloud,
    afraid to let my pleas be too loud,
    so lifeless I'm barely there,
    too paralyzed to let my feelings be shared.




    Submitted on 2008-01-28 14:26:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I really don't know what to say about this one. I like the poem and the use of nature. Rhyme was really good in showing your feelings. It doesn't seem like you are afraid to let your feelings show. That is great courage and is what makes poems really good. It lets people feel what your feeling. I think you are a writer in the making. Keep it up
    | Posted on 2008-10-24 00:00:00 | by DemonofHeaven | [ Reply to This ]
      I like how you connected your feelings with nature. Your like a weed that can't live without a host, or something to feed off of, so the day he left was the day you died because you had nothing to nurture you, is that it? Don't be afraid to let your feelings show okay, because they seem to have worked wonderfully on this piece.
    ~Chelle
    | Posted on 2008-01-28 00:00:00 | by Priestess | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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