Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Always [Mistake]dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Morsketch
    ASL Info:    21/F/TX
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 28/26/26
    Words: 124
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1169
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 827



    Description:
       At the risk of taking something from the poem, it's not completely autobiographical.

    Also, I like the title 'Always' better than 'Mistake' for the tone of the poem, but having the concept of a mistake made out of naivety attached to the poem was important to me. Which is why it seems like there's two titles.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAlways [Mistake]dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I値l never be a hater,
    I値l never be a lie,
    I値l never cry a river,
    As I wish to die.

    I値l never take a knife,
    I値l never kill myself,
    I値l never take five bottles,
    Of pills from off the shelf.

    I値l never fail that test,
    I値l never be alone,
    I値l never pick up crying,
    Or without a glance, put down the phone.

    I値l never give up trying,
    I値l never leave a fight,
    I値l never stay up restless,
    The entire endless night.

    I値l never try a substance,
    I値l never loose control,
    I値l never use a bottle,
    To heal my broken soul.

    But somewhere down the road,
    The line began to blur,
    Never became Always,
    And Always has no cure.




    Submitted on 2008-02-02 16:46:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      By far the best. Not only because I'm a bias on some of them, saw a few that hit a soft spot and spoke out bias and non bias, but this one is the best in light of both.
    | Posted on 2008-05-08 00:00:00 | by BlazeFlamme | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmmm. I want to say something other than this work was great. So, I shall try. Ahem. I liked this poem because of it's truthful-ness. I know what this poem means. Many people say they're not going to do something, but in the end, they end up doing it anyway. My favorite part was

    But somewhere down the road,
    The lines began to blur,
    Never became Always,
    And Always has no cure.

    I loved this piece, and I look forward to reading more of your stuff. Peace and inspiration!

    Duv
    | Posted on 2008-02-02 00:00:00 | by Draumrkopa | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    156963

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Bam (Awash). written by Daniel Barlow
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    an explanation of how i was not good written by Daniel Barlow
    This written by Chelebel
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Instances written by hyproglo
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ... written by Daniel Barlow
    Saying it to you with some gangsta shit written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    "other people don't get that" written by Daniel Barlow
    Everyone written by poetotoe
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Chelebel
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry