[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Always [Mistake]dots

    Author: Morsketch
    ASL Info:    21/F/TX
    Elite Ratio:    3.6 - 27/26/26
    Words: 124
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1095
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 827

       At the risk of taking something from the poem, it's not completely autobiographical.

    Also, I like the title 'Always' better than 'Mistake' for the tone of the poem, but having the concept of a mistake made out of naivety attached to the poem was important to me. Which is why it seems like there's two titles.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAlways [Mistake]dots

    I値l never be a hater,
    I値l never be a lie,
    I値l never cry a river,
    As I wish to die.

    I値l never take a knife,
    I値l never kill myself,
    I値l never take five bottles,
    Of pills from off the shelf.

    I値l never fail that test,
    I値l never be alone,
    I値l never pick up crying,
    Or without a glance, put down the phone.

    I値l never give up trying,
    I値l never leave a fight,
    I値l never stay up restless,
    The entire endless night.

    I値l never try a substance,
    I値l never loose control,
    I値l never use a bottle,
    To heal my broken soul.

    But somewhere down the road,
    The line began to blur,
    Never became Always,
    And Always has no cure.

    Submitted on 2008-02-02 16:46:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      By far the best. Not only because I'm a bias on some of them, saw a few that hit a soft spot and spoke out bias and non bias, but this one is the best in light of both.
    | Posted on 2008-05-08 00:00:00 | by BlazeFlamme | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmmm. I want to say something other than this work was great. So, I shall try. Ahem. I liked this poem because of it's truthful-ness. I know what this poem means. Many people say they're not going to do something, but in the end, they end up doing it anyway. My favorite part was

    But somewhere down the road,
    The lines began to blur,
    Never became Always,
    And Always has no cure.

    I loved this piece, and I look forward to reading more of your stuff. Peace and inspiration!

    | Posted on 2008-02-02 00:00:00 | by Draumrkopa | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    You do, I Do written by poetotoe
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    AI written by poetotoe
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Linger written by saartha
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Because of You written by poetotoe
    Push written by JanePlane
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    written by Daniel Barlow
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]